Hey ya! I'm Jo!

I help people experience authentic
happiness in their relationships

 How To Be Happy Series #4
What Is Happiness?

What is happiness to you?

Is happiness pleasure? Is she chasing and achieving your dreams?


[Transcript of 'What is happiness?'] What is happiness? What does happiness mean to you? A FB Live with Jo's Group. 

Right if you were happy, what do you think it would look like?What would be that one thing you believe that being happy would bring for you?

I think for many of us, happiness feels like something that's got to do with pleasure right? And comfort. We wanna feel good the way we feel when we're doing something we really truly enjoy.

And that pleasure is the thing that we chase.

The irony of chasing that pleasure is that that chase of that pleasure is in fact what makes us unhappy. The more it makes us unhappy the more we're chasing it, the more unhappy we feel about ourselves and our lives...

...Because that thing we are chasing becomes quite illusive. Even if it's something that’s easy to get. Like lets say its food, and we're able to easily get the food that makes us feel good, the good feeling [00:01:10] is not quite the same as when we had it last time, now we need more of it, we need it more often and the side effects of the thing we're chasing, is not that cool.

If you think about food (for example) - the side effects of chasing food to gain that happiness is gaining weight, getting sick.

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But lets talk about your dreams. The chase for your dreams.

Do you think it makes you feel happy? Or does it make you feel unhappy?

[00:01:44] Most of us we look at where we are right now and we feel like we are just enough and we feel like we've failed.

Here’s the thing if you're not able to be happy with who you are RIGHT NOW and where you are in your life right now it won't matter what you achieve in your life -  you're gonna spend your entire life unhappy and this is why:

[00:02:09] If you look back to 10 years ago  and you think of a goal you had that you're living today.  

For example, when you were in school you may have thought,

'If I just get a job, when I have a job then I’m gonna be happy or when I finally get a car then I'm gonna be happy or when I get my degree then I’m gonna be happy.'

What's happened since, is you've had the degree, you've had the job, you've made some money - yet you're still not happy.

What is happiness? This is why you're not happy!

[00:02:38] Lets say this is the goal that you're going for. Its here. (Shows a big goal up in the future)

You grab it and now you have it. Now what’s happened is you have a new vision for yourself so this accomplishment that you've achieved now moves down here, and now you have something up again. Once again you're looking up towards a new dream, of a new vision for yourself and there is gap between where you are right now and between where you want to be.

That gap is what causes you to feel incredibly unhappy about yourself and your life and you compare yourself and you look to where you should be.

And really it's the ideal you have in your own head of what you think your life should like and be like. As you achieve a dream and as you achieve a goal - a new one will constantly come because you’re a creative being and you have innate yearning to stretch yourself and an innate desire to be bigger and to be expansive and to grow.

(Check out LifeHack.com 50 Things that make you unhappy.)

What that means is your greatest work is to become happy right now, with who you are right now, where you are right now  - even though your dream may feel far off. 

Even though you feel like you don't know how to attain that dream.

It is an illusion that that dream is going to bring you any kind of happiness.

The happier you can be right now, the more you're going to be able to bring the best of yourself to that dream.

Because you're gonna feel good inside, you're gonna have more energy and you're gonna have more enthusiasm.

So stop dream chasing, and start dream being. Because you are already living so much of what you intended for yourself a long, long time ago.

You just can't see it. Because now you have moved so much and you're looking at this incredible vision you have for yourself, you've forgotten just how much you've already gained and everything you've already achieved. 

What is happiness - is whatever you decide it to be. 

This is just a tip to dropping the dissatisfaction - with where your life is at right now, and dropping the chasing of happiness, dropping the chase for your dreams.

Being content and grateful and alive within yourself with who you are right now and where you are right now because honestly it is enough.

This is taken from a Facebook Live Call I did with my Facebook Group: Happiness Pathfinders. C'mon over and join us. 

This is one aspect to the exploration around 'What is happiness?' I'm turning it into to the How To Be Happy Series. Tell us below in the comment section 'What does happiness mean to you? How do YOU feel about the possibility of happiness in your life? 

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How Can I Help You ?

Any happiness or stress management tips, advice or recommendations on my website, is not to be taken as medical advice. If you're struggling with anxiety, feeling low or an illness, visit a doctor or professional medical practitioner, especially before making changes to your current treatment. I urge you research anything and everything on your own before you make any changes. I'm a life coach and teacher. I'm not a doctor, therapist, nutritionist or personal trainer. I share freely share my experiences, my story, my opinions and research findings. It is my legal obligation to tell you I am not God but simply another human being like you, walking a path of trial and error. Kalavati Cafe, and anyone associated to this website or courses, can not be held responsible or liable for any choices you take. 

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